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| What you say is priceless? Martin wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits up and notices his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Martin looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless and clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!" So he goes to the kitchen and, sure enough, there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Martin asks, "Son, what happened last night?" His son says, "Well, you came home around 3 a.m., drunk and delirious. You broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door." Confused, Martin asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?" His son replies, "Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you said, 'Get your hands off me, *****! I'm married!'" Moral of the Story: Self-induced hangover... 100 pounds Broken furniture... 2,000 pounds Breakfast... 10 pounds Saying the right thing to your wife when you're drunk... PRICELESS |
| best one I've ever heard. Wish all bloke were like that |
| Priceless is what you say- enjoy? Martin wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits up and notices his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Martin looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless and clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!" So he goes to the kitchen and, sure enough, there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Martin asks, "Son, what happened last night?" His son says, "Well, you came home around 3 a.m., drunk and delirious. You broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door." Confused, Martin asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?" His son replies, "Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you said, 'Get your hands off me, *****! I'm married!'" Moral of the Story: Self-induced hangover... 100 pounds Broken furniture... 2,000 pounds Breakfast... 10 pounds Saying the right thing to your wife when you're drunk... PRICELESS |
| fabulous love it if my partner said that very same thing to me (if he DARED get in that position) i would love him even more than ever and would probably cry everyday to myself with adoration xx EVERY WOMAN who reads this is going to think of you as a big old romantic now don't you? |
| What would your priceless advice be about beauty tips? We all hear about drinking pleanty, eating healthy and being active. What would it be for you ladies? Would it be always wearing that lip gloss, being imaginative with hair/hair accessories or perhaps keeping up with the eye makeup? This question is for fun, I would like to hear your OWN opinions. Thanks! |
| Don't fight what you have! I have really curly hair, and I fought it and straightened it and generally destroyed it for years. Well, I finally gave up. And I love my curls now! They are bouncy and tight, and they match my personality- wild and a true non-conformist. I wanted straight hair so I could have those cute rocker razor cuts, but my curls say all that for me-naturally! Embrace what makes you unique-you will be pleasantly surprised! |
| PRICELESS WORDS(It's awesome)? A husband wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. "Honey, breakfast is on the table, I left early to go grocery shopping. Love You!" Totally shocked with the note , he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. He asks, "Son, what happened last night?" His son says, "Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some crockery, puked in the hall, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door". Confused, the man asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me? I should expect a big quarrel with her!" His son replies, "Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your clothes n shoes off, you said, "LADY LEAVE ME ALONE! I'M MARRIED!" Moral Self-induced hangover - $ 400.00 Broken crockery - $ 800.00 Breakfast - $ 10.00 Saying the Right Thing While Drunk – "PRICELESS " There are truly some things that both money and Mastercard can't buy |
| omg thats great! did u make that one up or was it an actual commercial? star for you! |
| What was your priceless halloween moment ? Mine was like this alcohol 40$ candy 25$ halloween costume 15$ spending time with friends getting drunk and watching the Yankees beat the Phillie's Priceless !!!!!! |
| Mine: $10 white jacket $12 white dress pants $17 white hat $11.99 sequence glove $15 for material for the rest of my costume 5 hrs on my sewing machine Everyone saying, nice Michael Jackson costume! priceless. Love you Michael R.I.P. |
| Whats more upperclass Tea or Coffee? Take numbers into consideration, only the queen drinks tea in priceless china. Then again most coffee drunk is stewed and reheated from a machine... |
| most americans drink coffee. it's really just an american obsession. tea is considered more upper class because it's a european thing, and europe has a lot of "old money", which is far classier than the "new money" of the americas. |
| Haha my grandma is so drunk, any ideas? She is a nice old lady, but for the first time she is drunk cuz of wine and she started yelling about some wedding she went to where something happened or something She is sh*tfaced and it is priceless I'm 17 btw, no ideas involving me drinking? thanks |
| run..... |
| Why has Family Guy gotten less and less funny the past few seasons? Sure, there are still the occasional laughs, but in my humble opinion Family Guy just isn't what it used to be. The first few seasons were priceless. I miss evil Stewie and Brian the drunk. Whatever happened there? The Cleveland Show hasn't really impressed me very much either. Your thoughts? |
| Runnin out of ideas |
| How many legal citizens of the USA have been killed by illegal aliens? If there are 12 Americans murdered daily by illegal aliens and 13 killed by drunk illegal alien drivers. What would be a rough estimate of the number of Americans killed by illegal aliens since we have started to keep count? My teacher wants me to do a report about how many illegals have been killed by American citizens. I find this to be very biased cause everyone knows illegals have killed a lot more Americans. Can anyone give me a rough estimate. A reliable website would be priceless. |
| The big problem is that often illegal aliens are made up of the worst elements of the society in which they come from. Their crime sprees in the United States is just a continuation of what they did back in their own nations before they arrived in the United States. As to drunk driving, in many places it's not looked at as a serious crime. Even in the USA, back when I was a guy, it was not considered "serious." It's only been since the late 70's the drunk driving has been considered a serious crime. illegal aliens, often come from places where driving drunk is commonplace. |